The language used by sex addicts is so darn cute and predictable. Like most things with a sex addict, however, there’s a hidden meaning.

First, we have the language of reconciliation:

• Slip- up  =  “I have no respect for you so I stuck my penis in other people. Again.”
• Mistake  =  “I got caught sticking my penis in other people. Again.”
• I’m sorry =  “I said I’m sorry. Leave me alone to go stick my penis in other people.”
• I’ve changed  = “I am better able to hide it when I stick my penis in other people.”
• I won’t do it again = “I won’t admit to you again if my penis goes astray .”

Then, the language of separation/divorce:

• “work together” = “do it my way”
• “keep the money away from those greedy lawyers” = “do it my way”
• “for the children’s sake” = “do it my way”
• “sit down at the kitchen table and hammer out an agreement” = “do it my way”
• “we need to talk everyday during this process” = “I’m gonna need to step up the harassment to get you to do it my way”

and finally, the language of remarriage:

• “I’m getting remarried” = “I found a woman who shall never find out I like to stick my penis in other people. I won’t make that mistake again! And with her, I shall prove that this was all your fault.”